I got in-laws in town. Don't worry they're cool. I just wanna say my computer time may be limited this week and I am dying to share with you my thoughts on President Obama. As I am sure you are dying to know (just kidding). I also have roughly 55 people coming over for Super Bowl and my FIL's 60th birthday to deal with. I will get back to you all as soon as I can.
When I don't write for awhile my brain becomes a cable news show. You know how they have that running commentary of news items on the bottom of the screen? That is what my brain becomes until I get it out of my system by putting it in writing. Sometimes I just have to stop and write a quick outline on a piece of paper and then throw it away just to purge my brain of that line of words constantly moving across my frontal lobes. Does this happen to anyone else?
Monday, January 26, 2009
Monday, January 19, 2009
Less Than 30 Minutes Recipe Week #2
I have lost 2.5 pounds in the last 2 weeks, so eating healthy so far is worth it. Even though I do miss the See's candy from December............sigh.
Mexican Pork Chops
Thin cut pork chops
2 tsps. chili powder
salt to taste
15 oz. can of black beans rinsed
1/4 cup diced red onion
2Tbs. chopped cilantro
1 tsp. olive oil
1 Tbsp. apple cider vinegar or fresh squeezed lime.
Rub the pork chops with chili powder, 1/2 to 1 tsp. each side and salt to taste. Brown chops in non-stick skillet, rinse beans in colander with warm water so the skins don't split, set aside. Chop onions and cilantro. Toss everything but chops in a bowl. Put 1/2 cup serving on plate and top with pork chop or serve beans on side. Resist the cheese and chips. Serve with a Corona lite and a lime wedge.
1/2 cup serving black bean salad and one thin pork chop and a lite beer is a total of 9 Weight Watcher's Points.
Mexican Pork Chops
Thin cut pork chops
2 tsps. chili powder
salt to taste
15 oz. can of black beans rinsed
1/4 cup diced red onion
2Tbs. chopped cilantro
1 tsp. olive oil
1 Tbsp. apple cider vinegar or fresh squeezed lime.
Rub the pork chops with chili powder, 1/2 to 1 tsp. each side and salt to taste. Brown chops in non-stick skillet, rinse beans in colander with warm water so the skins don't split, set aside. Chop onions and cilantro. Toss everything but chops in a bowl. Put 1/2 cup serving on plate and top with pork chop or serve beans on side. Resist the cheese and chips. Serve with a Corona lite and a lime wedge.
1/2 cup serving black bean salad and one thin pork chop and a lite beer is a total of 9 Weight Watcher's Points.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Toddler Vandalism
Before we moved into this house roughly 18 months ago, it was pristine. A family that had 1 eight year old girl lived here. Then we moved in with a 3 year old, a 22 month old and a 7 month old. Now this house is far less than pristine.
The once white walls are scuffed, chipped and dented. This what happens when hot wheels are driven on the walls and Jake and Mike like to take a Radio Flyer Rocket and slam it into the walls. This act of vandalism leaves cone shaped dents. We even have an exposed nail head.
We have had to have the carpets cleaned at least 4 times already. I still have one more kid to potty train and then I want all new carpeting.
The worst act of vandalism my savage toddlers have inflicted is what they have done to this once intact screen door.
Need any demolition done? My crew will work for candy.
The once white walls are scuffed, chipped and dented. This what happens when hot wheels are driven on the walls and Jake and Mike like to take a Radio Flyer Rocket and slam it into the walls. This act of vandalism leaves cone shaped dents. We even have an exposed nail head.
We have had to have the carpets cleaned at least 4 times already. I still have one more kid to potty train and then I want all new carpeting. 
The worst act of vandalism my savage toddlers have inflicted is what they have done to this once intact screen door. 
Need any demolition done? My crew will work for candy. Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Weekly < 30 minute Recipe #1
I need to look smoking hot for my 20 year high school reunion, or at least luke warm. So I need to lose weight. So I need to eat healthy. Fuck Rachel Ray, I need recipes that are less than 30 minutes. Erik and I eat usually eat after the kids are in bed, so I need something that I can make in less than 30 minutes because I am just too damn tired to remain standing any longer than that.
I was half-heartedly following this woman's blog where she made 365 crockpot recipes. One for every day of the year. That is super cool. I am not that organized. How about I promise at least one less than 30 minute recipe a week?
This first one I made the other night and it was super tasty! Bacon-Cheese-Turkey-Burger with Special Sauce. I figured out the Weight Watcher's points for it as well, if you are into that kind of thing.
Bacon-Cheese-Turkey Burger with Special Sauce
Sauce:
1 Tbs. Mayonaisse
1 Tbs. Fat free Sour Cream
2 Tbs. ketchup
1 tsp. sweet pickle relish
Dash of Tabasco
Dash of Apple Cider Vinegar
Stir all together and throw in fridge, until you need it.
Burgers:
1.25 lb. package Lean ground turkey meat
1 Tbs. bacon bits (real bacon I used Hormel brand found in salad dressing aisle)
1/4 Garlic-Herb bread crumbs
1 tsp. onion soup mix (optional)
1 egg beaten
As much chopped lettuce as you desire.
Make the sauce and toss in fridge. Beat egg in large bowl, add ground turkey meat, add bread crumbs, onion soup mix (or salt and pepper), and bacon bits. Take off rings and mix with your hands and form into 4 patties.
Toss onto a hot frying pan, brown both sides, maybe 2 minutes each side or more. Reduce heat and cook, covered if you want, until center is no longer pink. I am bad at times because I cook from my brain, sorry.
So if you serve this on lettuce with special sauce spooned on top you are looking at 5.5 pt.s This is for one patty and 2 hefty Tbs. of Special Sauce. I ate a patty on my fave sliced sourdough bread which is 6 points per slice! That's a lot! That means I was looking at 11.5 points per serving! So I would reccomend serving this over a bed of lettuce.
My husband loved it and ate 2 patties and 2 slices of bread earning him 23 points!!! That is more than I am allowed to eat on Weight Watchers for the whole day, asshole.
I was half-heartedly following this woman's blog where she made 365 crockpot recipes. One for every day of the year. That is super cool. I am not that organized. How about I promise at least one less than 30 minute recipe a week?
This first one I made the other night and it was super tasty! Bacon-Cheese-Turkey-Burger with Special Sauce. I figured out the Weight Watcher's points for it as well, if you are into that kind of thing.
Bacon-Cheese-Turkey Burger with Special Sauce
Sauce:
1 Tbs. Mayonaisse
1 Tbs. Fat free Sour Cream
2 Tbs. ketchup
1 tsp. sweet pickle relish
Dash of Tabasco
Dash of Apple Cider Vinegar
Stir all together and throw in fridge, until you need it.
Burgers:
1.25 lb. package Lean ground turkey meat
1 Tbs. bacon bits (real bacon I used Hormel brand found in salad dressing aisle)
1/4 Garlic-Herb bread crumbs
1 tsp. onion soup mix (optional)
1 egg beaten
As much chopped lettuce as you desire.
Make the sauce and toss in fridge. Beat egg in large bowl, add ground turkey meat, add bread crumbs, onion soup mix (or salt and pepper), and bacon bits. Take off rings and mix with your hands and form into 4 patties.
Toss onto a hot frying pan, brown both sides, maybe 2 minutes each side or more. Reduce heat and cook, covered if you want, until center is no longer pink. I am bad at times because I cook from my brain, sorry.
So if you serve this on lettuce with special sauce spooned on top you are looking at 5.5 pt.s This is for one patty and 2 hefty Tbs. of Special Sauce. I ate a patty on my fave sliced sourdough bread which is 6 points per slice! That's a lot! That means I was looking at 11.5 points per serving! So I would reccomend serving this over a bed of lettuce.
My husband loved it and ate 2 patties and 2 slices of bread earning him 23 points!!! That is more than I am allowed to eat on Weight Watchers for the whole day, asshole.
Bragging
The other day I suggested everyone in my new and improved mom's club brag on their kids. We so often have to hold back because of our good manners, and let those other mom's ramble on about their less than superior children. So I thought it would be very therapeutic for us well-mannered moms to let loose about just how fabulous our children are.
Let's see, here are my brags:
Mike= My firstborn, is the best at making up songs. They are mostly inappropriate, but after I gripe at him to clean up his language, I go around the corner and crack up. His sense of humor is awesome.
He also has a way better sense of direction than I do (that's not hard), we won't go somewhere for a year, and he totally knows where we are and which way to turn.
Physically he is amazing, he can throw a spiral already, kick a soccer ball, and outrun and jump anyone.
Bekah= Is my academic kid. Her vocabulary is really amazing. She is wicked smart. The other day Mike was doing an alphabet puzzle and Bekah was secretly hiding the next letter he would need to continue the puzzle! She was torturing the hell out of him, and me, because I had to go intervene. Pretty clever though.
She also makes up songs too, and her's are nice songs about rainbows and flying cats. Mike's songs are about poop, butts, shooting and punching.
Jake= He knows some of his alphabet and how to count to 3! He is only 20 months old. He is very cuddly too. And funny.
Yesterday he tackled Bekah and pulled down her pants and underwear and started patting her on her bare tushy. We were all laughing so hard I was afraid Bekah was going to pee on the carpet so I had to stop him. I have no idea why he did this!
Charlotte
Let's see, here are my brags:
Mike= My firstborn, is the best at making up songs. They are mostly inappropriate, but after I gripe at him to clean up his language, I go around the corner and crack up. His sense of humor is awesome.
He also has a way better sense of direction than I do (that's not hard), we won't go somewhere for a year, and he totally knows where we are and which way to turn.
Physically he is amazing, he can throw a spiral already, kick a soccer ball, and outrun and jump anyone.
Bekah= Is my academic kid. Her vocabulary is really amazing. She is wicked smart. The other day Mike was doing an alphabet puzzle and Bekah was secretly hiding the next letter he would need to continue the puzzle! She was torturing the hell out of him, and me, because I had to go intervene. Pretty clever though.
She also makes up songs too, and her's are nice songs about rainbows and flying cats. Mike's songs are about poop, butts, shooting and punching.
Jake= He knows some of his alphabet and how to count to 3! He is only 20 months old. He is very cuddly too. And funny.
Yesterday he tackled Bekah and pulled down her pants and underwear and started patting her on her bare tushy. We were all laughing so hard I was afraid Bekah was going to pee on the carpet so I had to stop him. I have no idea why he did this!
Charlotte
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Before you have kids most people know that you are going to be dealing with a lot of poop. Then you become a parent and realize you had no idea just exactly how many different bodily fluids you have to deal with on a daily basis. Then you become a seasoned parent and build up an immunity to grossness. Nothing seems to make you squeamish anymore. Yesterday I found something that made me very squeamish.
We went to the usual weekend little kid's birthday gathering with mandatory jumpy house in the backyard. Jake's shoes were off due to the jumpy house and he managed to make a few runs of the backyard in his socks so they got very dirty. He was very tired after the party and on his way home instead of popping a binkie (pacifier) into his mouth he peeled off one of his filthy socks and stuck it in his mouth! Retch!
Jake is 3 rows back in the mini-van so I couldn't reach him to tear the offending sock out of his mouth and I was driving so I couldn't climb back there. Erik can't turn around in a moving vehicle because he gets car sick. I was forced to look at the below image everytime I looked in my rearview mirror. Gag!
We went to the usual weekend little kid's birthday gathering with mandatory jumpy house in the backyard. Jake's shoes were off due to the jumpy house and he managed to make a few runs of the backyard in his socks so they got very dirty. He was very tired after the party and on his way home instead of popping a binkie (pacifier) into his mouth he peeled off one of his filthy socks and stuck it in his mouth! Retch!
Jake is 3 rows back in the mini-van so I couldn't reach him to tear the offending sock out of his mouth and I was driving so I couldn't climb back there. Erik can't turn around in a moving vehicle because he gets car sick. I was forced to look at the below image everytime I looked in my rearview mirror. Gag!
As soon as I got home I snuck that hideous thing out of his mouth. And took a picture of it. The toes of the sock were in his mouth and he was actually sucking on it like a pacifier. This nice family owns a large dog so you can just imagine the things that sock picked up. Heave!
I guess it's nice to know I am not as jaded as I thought I was. Maybe having a fourth child will finally make me immune to all things disgusting. Hurl!
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Underwear Man Show Me Your Muscles!
Last week for some bizarre reason Mike didn't settle right down and go to sleep. All of a sudden we heard him sneaking downstairs and when he came into the living room he was wearing a pair of underwear on his head and a pair on his chest. Only G-d knows why.
Before sending him off to bed we had to take a picture. After that he went straight to bed and we didn't hear from him again until morning.
Michael is 4 years old, what's he going to be like when he is older? I can just see him in college wearing a pair of underwear on his head and being the life of the party. Fine with me as long as he gets excellent grades.
Before sending him off to bed we had to take a picture. After that he went straight to bed and we didn't hear from him again until morning.
Michael is 4 years old, what's he going to be like when he is older? I can just see him in college wearing a pair of underwear on his head and being the life of the party. Fine with me as long as he gets excellent grades.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Balloon Entanglement
Jake is having some issues with these balloons. Bekah's kitty, Oscar-Garfield, is also tangled up in the balloon string and that's why she is yanking on Jake.
Funny guys and Grumps
I just couldn't fathom taking all 3 kids to the grocery store yesterday so I got lazy and used Safeway.com. I don't know if this happens to you but whenever somebody comes to our front door all hell breaks loose.
Ding-dong! Everyone runs for the front door, and I have to make it there first just in case the very top lock isn't engaged, so they don't open the door to a serial killer. This time it was locked and it's only the Safeway guy who turns out to be a new one. They are all nice but some of them seem to be frightened by the chaos that greets them. This guy seems thrilled.
Safeway guy starts laughing and I look behind me to see that Jake has lost his pants and diaper on his run to the front door. He is wearing a green jersey and a smile. Safeway guy points and says, "Hey I have a pair of pajamas at home just like that.". I have been giggling about that ever since yesterday. Even funnier because Safeway guy is the size of a professional football player. The mental image is just too much!
He was so nice and even offered to help me put my groceries away, which I declined and he refused a tip. I said, "You must have kids, you seem right at home. ". He said, "No just a humongous family and 2 young G-d daughters I spend a lot of time with.". What a sweet guy. I love running into people like that, makes me proud of the human race.
Earlier in the day we encountered a sour puss, totally different human being than the sweet guy mentioned above. Me, Mike and Jake had dropped off Bekah at preschool and as we walked out to the parking lot in the rain Mike starts to sing a tune.
Ding-dong! Everyone runs for the front door, and I have to make it there first just in case the very top lock isn't engaged, so they don't open the door to a serial killer. This time it was locked and it's only the Safeway guy who turns out to be a new one. They are all nice but some of them seem to be frightened by the chaos that greets them. This guy seems thrilled.
Safeway guy starts laughing and I look behind me to see that Jake has lost his pants and diaper on his run to the front door. He is wearing a green jersey and a smile. Safeway guy points and says, "Hey I have a pair of pajamas at home just like that.". I have been giggling about that ever since yesterday. Even funnier because Safeway guy is the size of a professional football player. The mental image is just too much!
He was so nice and even offered to help me put my groceries away, which I declined and he refused a tip. I said, "You must have kids, you seem right at home. ". He said, "No just a humongous family and 2 young G-d daughters I spend a lot of time with.". What a sweet guy. I love running into people like that, makes me proud of the human race.
Earlier in the day we encountered a sour puss, totally different human being than the sweet guy mentioned above. Me, Mike and Jake had dropped off Bekah at preschool and as we walked out to the parking lot in the rain Mike starts to sing a tune.
"It's raining, it's pouring
the old man is snoring
he went to bed
and I punched him in the head."
This other parent, a grumpy dad, says very sarcastically, "Nice song.". I just meekly said, "Yes that wasn't very nice.". But what I was really thinking was that Mike did a really good job of rhyming.
So grumpy dad has a perfect kid, or a kid who hasn't reached the age of 4 yet. Good luck with that.
Thursday, January 1, 2009
2008 Re-Cap
Happy New Year!!! I am sooo looking forward to 2009. Much love and peace to everyone. Here are the highlights of 2008:
Janurary 2008
-Charlotte called the director of Mike's preschool a dominatrix in her blog and then had to go back and delete it because some nosy mom read it.
-Charlotte had her first mentstrual cycle in 3 years because she was finally not pregnant or nursing for the first time in 3 years. This happened the morning Erik and Charlotte were to fly to Vegas. This was supposed to be the first time Charlotte had been to Vegas in 3 years when she wasn't pregnant or nursing.
-Our beloved nanny Katie informed Charlotte she was moving back home to Washington. Noooooooo!
Februrary 2008
-All 3 kids got pink-eye so Charlotte took them to the beach.
-New nanny quit after one day, breaking the old record of a day and a half. At least she didn't just walk out like that other one did after Mike hit her in the head with a dump truck.
-Charlotte found another nanny, a keeper, Sarah.
March 2008
-Charlotte beat her Dad at Scrabble by 400 points.
-Charlotte pulled Mike out of his preschool before they kicked him out. Mike assaulted teachers, students, used bad language and ran with 3 pairs of scissors in his hand.
-Jake turned 1 year old! Giving Erik and Charlotte a 1 year old, a 2 year old and a 3 year old!
April 2008
-Charlotte had a root canal.
-Michael outgrew his kidney reflux that had been diagnosed when he was 20 weeks in utero. Erik and Charlotte were greatly relieved!
-Erik and Charlotte spent a weekend all by themselves in San Francisco. They did nothing but eat and sleep.
-Michael started his third preschool and finally found a place that could handle him!
-Erik had pneumonia.
May 2008
-Charlotte ripped almost her whole pinkie nail off while trying to wrestle Bekah into her carseat.
-Erik and Charlotte took all 3 kids to an open house in a 2.5 million dollar home that had just been remodeled. Erik and Charlotte strongly advise other parents to never do this.
-The whole family went to Auntie Kristin's 40th birthday party and had a great time.
June 2008
-George Carlin died
-Erik and Charlotte had a date day in Livermore for father's day. They had lunch and went wine-tasting.
-Charlotte dressed up all 3 monkeys in Giants baseball outfits and took them to Grandpa Rankin's baseball game for Father's day. Grandpa Rankin's team is named The Giants. Mike, Bekah and Jake are the unofficial mascots.
July 2008
-Jake gets a double ear infection and Roseola.
-Mike is the star of the end of year preschool show.
-A friend of a neighbor gets into a physical fight on 4th of July night and Charlotte has to call 911.
-Estelle visits.
-Merrill and Chris sell their house.
-Mike and Bekah go to Jewish Day Camp together.
-The whole family goes camping with Grandpa Rankin and Grandma Cherie.
August 2008
-Charlotte spends the whole month obsessively watching politics on t.v.
-Mike starts Pre-K
-Bekah starts preschool and doesnt' shed a single tear.
September 2008
-Sarah Palin
-Charlotte's brother Bill came to visit.
-Charlotte's brother Bill gets deployed to Iraq.
-Charlotte loses 26 lbs. in 9 months.
-Bekah feels her first earthquake and the boys don't even notice.
October 2008
-Rutting season starts in San Ramon and there are a ton of wild deer running behind Erik and Charlotte's house. Chris Grimmer wants to hunt them with a cross-bow.
-Charlotte takes all 3 kids to temple by herself for the High Holy Day services and survives.
-Charlotte's best friends of 30 years visit with their children.
-A semi-truck hauling 2 trailers of dirt, loses one of it's trailers and dumps dirt all over a sidewalk on Erik and Charlotte's street.
-The whole family visits numerous pumpkin patches and Mike pees on one of the pumpkins.
-Erik's sister Merrill and her husband Chris move into their new home in San Ramon, yipee!
-Charlotte quits mom's club before she gets kicked out.
November 2008
-Obama
-Erik and Charlotte go to Erik's 20th high school year reunion.
-Charlotte's friends start a new mom's club and let her join.
-Thanksgiving.
-Charlotte's dad beats her at Scrabble.
December 2008
-Bekah turns 3 years old.
-Bekah gets her first haircut in a salon and tries to scratch the hairstylist.
-Bekah gets potty-trained.
-Erik and Charlotte go to a Raiders game in the rain.
-Hanukkah/Xmas
-Happy New Year.
Peace.
Charlotte
Janurary 2008
-Charlotte called the director of Mike's preschool a dominatrix in her blog and then had to go back and delete it because some nosy mom read it.
-Charlotte had her first mentstrual cycle in 3 years because she was finally not pregnant or nursing for the first time in 3 years. This happened the morning Erik and Charlotte were to fly to Vegas. This was supposed to be the first time Charlotte had been to Vegas in 3 years when she wasn't pregnant or nursing.
-Our beloved nanny Katie informed Charlotte she was moving back home to Washington. Noooooooo!
Februrary 2008
-All 3 kids got pink-eye so Charlotte took them to the beach.
-New nanny quit after one day, breaking the old record of a day and a half. At least she didn't just walk out like that other one did after Mike hit her in the head with a dump truck.
-Charlotte found another nanny, a keeper, Sarah.
March 2008
-Charlotte beat her Dad at Scrabble by 400 points.
-Charlotte pulled Mike out of his preschool before they kicked him out. Mike assaulted teachers, students, used bad language and ran with 3 pairs of scissors in his hand.
-Jake turned 1 year old! Giving Erik and Charlotte a 1 year old, a 2 year old and a 3 year old!
April 2008
-Charlotte had a root canal.
-Michael outgrew his kidney reflux that had been diagnosed when he was 20 weeks in utero. Erik and Charlotte were greatly relieved!
-Erik and Charlotte spent a weekend all by themselves in San Francisco. They did nothing but eat and sleep.
-Michael started his third preschool and finally found a place that could handle him!
-Erik had pneumonia.
May 2008
-Charlotte ripped almost her whole pinkie nail off while trying to wrestle Bekah into her carseat.
-Erik and Charlotte took all 3 kids to an open house in a 2.5 million dollar home that had just been remodeled. Erik and Charlotte strongly advise other parents to never do this.
-The whole family went to Auntie Kristin's 40th birthday party and had a great time.
June 2008
-George Carlin died
-Erik and Charlotte had a date day in Livermore for father's day. They had lunch and went wine-tasting.
-Charlotte dressed up all 3 monkeys in Giants baseball outfits and took them to Grandpa Rankin's baseball game for Father's day. Grandpa Rankin's team is named The Giants. Mike, Bekah and Jake are the unofficial mascots.
July 2008
-Jake gets a double ear infection and Roseola.
-Mike is the star of the end of year preschool show.
-A friend of a neighbor gets into a physical fight on 4th of July night and Charlotte has to call 911.
-Estelle visits.
-Merrill and Chris sell their house.
-Mike and Bekah go to Jewish Day Camp together.
-The whole family goes camping with Grandpa Rankin and Grandma Cherie.
August 2008
-Charlotte spends the whole month obsessively watching politics on t.v.
-Mike starts Pre-K
-Bekah starts preschool and doesnt' shed a single tear.
September 2008
-Sarah Palin
-Charlotte's brother Bill came to visit.
-Charlotte's brother Bill gets deployed to Iraq.
-Charlotte loses 26 lbs. in 9 months.
-Bekah feels her first earthquake and the boys don't even notice.
October 2008
-Rutting season starts in San Ramon and there are a ton of wild deer running behind Erik and Charlotte's house. Chris Grimmer wants to hunt them with a cross-bow.
-Charlotte takes all 3 kids to temple by herself for the High Holy Day services and survives.
-Charlotte's best friends of 30 years visit with their children.
-A semi-truck hauling 2 trailers of dirt, loses one of it's trailers and dumps dirt all over a sidewalk on Erik and Charlotte's street.
-The whole family visits numerous pumpkin patches and Mike pees on one of the pumpkins.
-Erik's sister Merrill and her husband Chris move into their new home in San Ramon, yipee!
-Charlotte quits mom's club before she gets kicked out.
November 2008
-Obama
-Erik and Charlotte go to Erik's 20th high school year reunion.
-Charlotte's friends start a new mom's club and let her join.
-Thanksgiving.
-Charlotte's dad beats her at Scrabble.
December 2008
-Bekah turns 3 years old.
-Bekah gets her first haircut in a salon and tries to scratch the hairstylist.
-Bekah gets potty-trained.
-Erik and Charlotte go to a Raiders game in the rain.
-Hanukkah/Xmas
-Happy New Year.
Peace.
Charlotte
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