Human Teething Rings

This is what my family has become to my youngest Jake. We are walking, talking (yelping), squishy, human teething rings. Hard to believe that somebody as adorable as the toddler pictured below can be such a cannibal. That sweet face is what the public sees, not the dangerous savage that we live with.
It started with some playful nips on the clothing of his siblings but they managed to push him off before he could get his teeth in. Mike and Bekah wised up quickly and now gently push Jake away anytime he comes near.


So then he started going after mommy and daddy. He nibbled on our shoulders a couple of times and then a week ago he locked onto my hand, hard. I yelped and as a reflex smacked him on the back with my other hand. I felt bad, but it stopped him from breaking the skin. A couple of days later I wouldn't let him unload the knives from the dishwasher (I am so mean) and when I turned back to rinsing dishes in the sink he ran up and bit me on the ass!!

But last Wednesday night was the worst. Again I am rinsing dishes in the sink and my husband is standing on the other side of the counter in the living room. I can only see Erik from the chest upwards. He is drinking a beer and telling me about his day when suddenly he yelps in a rather high-pitched voice. I turn off the water and ask,"What's wrong?!". He is leaning forward, not quite doubled over and clutching the family jewels. "That little bastard bit me on the nuts", he managed to say through clenched teeth. Of course I laughed. After I asked if he was ok.

Jake was lying on the ground crying because Erik had pushed him off, once again a normal human reflex when somebody is biting you. Especially if they are biting your privates. Jake was not hurt at all don't worry, but he did leave a mark on Erik. And Erik was wearing baggy jeans so Jake really clomped down.

Ewwww. No offense to my husband, or any other man, but that part of the body is just not attractive at all. Even less pretty to look at with a visible bite wound. And lucky me I got to see it up close and personal.

Pictured below is the Jake that we are accustomed to. He is drinking from a puddle in the backyard. I offered him fresh water but he prefers the flavor of brackish rain water as well as human skin.